Looking through the junkmail in my email spam folder for amusingly bad spellings and peculiar English, I instead discovered excerpts from The Adventures of Tom Sawyer among the viagra adverts and banking fraud alerts…

The brush continued to move.”Like it? Well, I don’t see why I oughtn’t to like it. Does a boy get a chance to whitewash a fence every day?”That put the thing in a new light. Ben stopped nibbling his apple. Tom swept his brush daintily back and forth — stepped back to note the effect — added a touch here and there — criticised the effect again — Ben watching every move and getting more and more interested, more and more absorbed.

“SHE! She never licks anybody — whacks ’em over the head with her thimble — and who cares for that, I’d like to know. She talks awful, but talk don’t hurt — anyways it don’t if she don’t cry. Jim, I’ll give you a marvel. I’ll give you a white alley!”Jim began to waver.

Spam comments that I’ve got on this blog are a little less literary…

Drum and Bass said: “Excellent subject I could not of thougth off that !”
Fetish Party said: “Nice Blog !!! your the best”

Maybe if spammers could spell they’d be a bit more successful.